i have been fasting for 3 years i am extremely lethargic extremely irritable and there is nothing i can really do about it aside from curb the cravings as much as possible, i am now searching for a donor perhaps even another sang but mainly i just need to make friends in the local community for support
of all the places my parents could move me to. they sent me to a town called summerland. why the hell would someone like me (pale and VERY photosensitive) get stuck in a town that gets like 40 degrees in the sumer?! its usually not so bad because in the summer i just sit in the basement(fun..) but it was just beforbreak so like any other day(not expecting the crappy weather) i go to school with mi sunglasses hat jacket and spf 60 and the scool decided that we r going to cleen up the town. within 15 minuits im sunburned. the next day i was blistered and peeling (should have worn the d**n spf 100. no. i should have just skipped school that day) ...ya for all the wanabbes out there..u dont even have a clue how much it sucks
I'm not legal for a donor and as I'm a vegetarian (keep finding lame excuses to stop and get blood from steak and stuff...) and have no connections to a butcher, my only resport is autovampirism. it leaves me drained and irritable, but it's the only way. Well, my thirsts are really bad and I get it so bad that I take a knife to my forearm and stab the crap out of it, so it gets mutilated.
My math teacher recently saw that. Now, I'm super freaked that I'm going to get sent to the counselor's office because everybody now thinks I cut myself: also known as SMS, which I don't have...why would I have ANY desire to watch myself bleed? I do it so I don't go crazy and stab someone in the hand or something during a really bad thirst, not so I can get rid of stress! Ok, a little, but as in, getting rid of the thirst, not like school pressure or anything. Well, everybody is completely convinced that I'm a cutter and that I have a psychopathic need to chop up my arm. It's total hell. Whenever I don't wear long sleeves (very rarely lately, and only indoors because of the sun) everybody sees my arms. The people I'm friends with ate up my fake story about my cat, and the people I don't know assume I'm a cutter. Sometimes I wish I could just tell them all what's happening, that they're all lucky they don't wake up the next day with an incision on their neck...well, that's melodramatic, and it would probably get me locked up. So I won't do that. I just wish people would stop assuming I need help for cutting myself, when in reality it's my only way of surviving the thirst and not freaking out on people.
xxrawrxx: you are sooooo right. All you wannabes who believe in sparkly vampires and want to be one because because you'll look "pretty", you have no idea what we go through. You are all lucky that you don't have to deal with the thirst.
Last Edit: Oct 15, 2010 14:45:44 GMT -5 by ariadne
I understand how you feel. Though, I have been free from blood for 5 years now and its hell at start, though it gets better by time. But the hunger is stil there, and sometimes I do feel the need for it even though I´m trying to avoid blood as much as possible due to my husband who hates it and doesnt belive in us.
Living a double life sucks really bad, but what do you do when you live in a world with humans who cant accept who we are or understands.
I have fasted for two years know and its driving me insane! I accidentally bite my boyfriend sometimes, he offers to donate for me but I always refuse it seems so immoral, also the constant sunlight, being awake during the day and being forced to sleep at night.... sometimes I don't know what to do.
Post by sanguinecrow66 on Aug 5, 2013 18:17:47 GMT -5
Auto vampirism is highly frowned upon in my family. I am 15 and my parents are both sanguinarians. We drink blood every day. I am very interested in how everyone else manages to get their blood. Plz message me and we may talk. I hve my own donor but i am aware some of our community do not. I would like to know how you manage to stay ontop of the cravings